NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION UPDATE

My new year's resolution for 2017 was to be kind to myself. Hello Gorgies how are we all doing with our new year's resolutions?

Since I can remember my new year's resolutions have always been something to do with my body. Lose weight, eat better, sleep more e.t.c. While these are great things to aspire to achieve I find that most of the time we neglect our mental health. Self-deprecation, modesty and sometimes just lack of self-confidence may make us very mean to ourselves. For me, calling yourself fat, ugly, unattractive or any other things we call ourselves mundanely or routinely constitute the numerous ways we are unkind to ourselves.

I made a huge career and geographical move at the beginning of 2014. Since then most of my life has been  a learning process. For the first time I had put myself first and didn't care much for the consequences. But of course with every new road you venture on, you are bound to get lost. I have been lost for the past two and a half years and have been trying to reconcile with myself. Which is what 2017 is all about for me. 

I have had (in some cases still have) depression, bulimia, corneal scarring due to allergies, astigmatism, dry eyes, lactose intolerance and numerous other problems I am not ready to discuss on a public platform. Instead of celebrating my body for how long it has been fighting to give me a 'normal' life, I have been tearing it down for not being 'perfect'. How many people can really say they are perfect? Our minds, bodies and spirits try to keep us happy but we never appreciate it. We are unkind to them.

I fell prey to letting the negative experiences in my life taint my perception of the beautiful world we live in. 'There is both joy and suffering on planet Earth because this beautiful world we live in is a world of duality - a world of opposites' Rhonda Byrne. Life is simply a dichotomy. To pray or hope to run away from the negative is to pray in vain. Learn and grow from negative situations. In these dark times kindness towards oneself is the key to survival and most importantly thriving.

I have fallen a few times on my quest for kindness towards myself. But today as I was meditating I had an epiphany that 'inspiration is not bought, it is sought' Lorraine Moalosi xx. Buying is not just in monetary terms but bartering as well. You don't have to give up anything to find inspiration, well maybe laziness, ignorance etc. But nothing of great significance will be reduced from you when you get inspiration. All you have to do is seek it out. 'Seek and ye shall find' Matthew 7:7. Seek kindness and you will find it. Whether it's within yourself or without, kindness is available and ready to be harvested.

I believe it is not the destination but the journey that is most paramount. I will never be kind to myself all the time but it is the active striving for kindness towards oneself that makes all the difference.

Feel free to leave a comment on your own thoughts xx. Enjoy your weekend.